Tools for Resilience: The 6 C’s for Peace & Harmony

As we enter our second month of social distancing, we are all struggling in some way. Whether we are now our child's homeroom, science, social studies, math, reading teacher in addition to our regular duties; whether we are an essential employee and still have to find ways to take care of our health and the health of our families while also doing our jobs; whether we have been sick or have lost someone in this; whether we have made the transitions to virtual work but still greatly miss our friends and family and our routines, we are all impacted.

The other day, I ran out of food and had to go to the grocery store. The whole experience was nerve wracking. I put my mask on before leaving the house. Immediately, I felt on edge and uncomfortable, as each breath fogged up my glasses and served as a reminder of the virus. As I entered the store, I was alert: scanning to see if there were people too close to me, seeing everyone scattered and anxious as they navigate the aisles, being bombarded with the face-masks and gloves, getting worried that I may have slipped up and touched my gloved hand on something I did not disinfect, and the list goes on. Things I would normally take for granted and do mindlessly changed drastically. I had to be hyper-vigilant. This is what the brain does in a traumatic situation. Areas are lit up in your brain telling you something is unsafe. Our ability to survive and cope during this is our resilience.

Resilience is not about maintaining positivity-it is about seeing our strength to overcome despite significant hardships and tragedy. It is about acknowledging, and not pushing aside, the realities and our feelings. Resilience allows us an opportunity to access our capacities to achieve some sense of inner peace and harmony again despite adversity. It is about acceptance and curiosity rather than judgment. It is about our ability to bounce back. We are enduring. This can be exhausting and terrifying; it can also show us what we're capable of.

To help you cultivate resilience in your life during this difficult time, we offer you a set of tools we call the 6 C's for Peace & Harmony:

Caring
• Caring for yourself throughout this is crucial. This includes doing what you can while acknowledging you are not operating at your optimal level. Practice good sleep hygiene, but also accept that you just might not be getting the sleep you once did. Try to eat healthy and exercise, but allow yourself cheat moments.
Compassion
• Be forgiving of yourself and others. Try to avoid placing judgment. Maybe you are not getting as much done as you once did. That is okay. More time does not mean more productivity. This is unprecedented and there are no rules on how to cope and get through this. Additionally, you cannot control other people's productivity or reaction. They are doing the best they can just like you. We all need extra forgiveness these days.
Connectedness
• The ability to connect with others is vitally important. This is why many have replaced the idea of "social distancing" with "physically distancing". Shared experience is healing and helps us get through. Connect through zoom, facebook groups, or sing on your balcony. Anything that makes you comfortable while staying connected.
Community
• Keep in mind that by staying inside, you are contributing to the collective good and that is enough right now. But if you're looking for more, consider giving back support by asking a neighbor if they're short on any supplies. Or write an uplifting chalk message for your neighbors to find on their walks. If you're in the position to do so, consider giving blood or donating to organizations in need.
Communication
• Clear and relevant communication is crucial during this and helps mitigate the effects of the trauma. Tune into trusted news sources (in moderation). It is important to have all the facts so we can be empowered to make the right decisions for ourselves. Also find appropriate outlets or sources of humor. A good belly laugh can be cathartic.
Competence
• Take credit for any accomplishments or wins. Maybe you started a project you had been wanting to tackle, or maybe you finished a blog post you had been wanting to write for a week.

In her address in early April, Queen Elizabeth gave a powerful message to us all, "We will succeed - and that success will belong to every one of us. We should take comfort that while we may have more still to endure, better days will return: we will be with our friends again; we will be with our families again; we will meet again." This is resilience.