Stop Bullying at Its Roots—in Early Childhood

What is the best way to prevent bullying in early childhood?

Bullying can occur among children as young as 3. But before bullying develops, children often experiment with many forms of harmful “pre-bullying” behaviors that do not yet fully qualify as bullying, which is defined as intentional, repeated and power-imbalanced forms of emotional or physical abuse. For example, when a young boy pushes a girl, grabs her toy and shouts, “Mine!” this “pre-bullying” behavior is typically done without a hostile intent to repeatedly harm a less powerful child, but rather as a single act with the practical purpose of acquiring the toy. Far too often, these “pre-bullying” behaviors are permitted to continue or are responded to in counterproductive ways that allow these early behaviors to develop into patterns of full-blown bullying. The good news is that young children’s “pre-bullying” behaviors can be recognized and stopped more easily in the early stages, thereby preventing them from turning into more complex and resistant patterns of bullying.

How can parents and other caregivers prevent bullying in early childhood?

Parents and other caregivers have an important opportunity and responsibility to help stop bullying before it starts in early childhood. However, most adults do not think about bullying until it has already grown into a major problem. To make matters worse, they may perpetuate violence by giving the victimized child the bad advice to beat up the bully.

To control bullying effectively, caregivers need to begin in the early childhood years to: (1) understand the nature and origins of bullying; (2) discuss and establish clear rules with young children that disallow harmful behavior and encourage helpful behavior; (3) teach and give young children practice in applying prevention skills they will need to strengthen in the roles of bully (empathy skills), victim (assertiveness skills) or bystander (problem-solving skills); and (4) prepare themselves to recognize and respond effectively to young children’s “pre-bullying” and early bullying behaviors. By working together before bullying has become a difficult and established problem, young children and adults can support each other in becoming effective bullying preventers.

What resources are available to help adults and young children prevent bullying?

A free and readily available toolkit, entitled Eyes on Bullying in Early Childhood by Dr. Kim Storey and Dr. Ron Slaby, provides easy-to-use, research-based guidelines and skill-building activities to help adults and young children become early bullying preventers. (http://eyesonbullying.org/pdfs/eob-early-childhood-508.pdf)

-Ron Slaby, Ph.D., TMI Scientific Board Member, Developmental psychologist, research scientist and educator who serves as a Senior Scientist at both Education Development Center (EDC) and the Center on Media and Child Health.