Cyberbullying

Bullying is not new. Like everything else, it has evolved. Today, social media is a large arena for bullying. As parents, many of us don’t have first-hand experience with cyberbullying, which makes it that much more important for us to educate ourselves. What does it mean? How does it occur? What are the signs? How do we prevent it?

Bullying is a pattern of repeated, unwanted, and aggressive behavior that involves a real or perceived power imbalance. Cyberbullying includes sending, posting, or sharing negative, harmful or mean content about someone else. It also includes sharing false or private information intended to cause embarrassment or humiliation. Most commonly, cyberbullying occurs on social media, messaging apps, online forums and chat rooms, and online gaming platforms. Tik Tok, Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, Fortnite, and Tumblr can all be used for this purpose.

Prevention is key:

• Start by establishing rules. Have open communication about your expectations for your child’s digital behavior, content, and apps.
• Monitor which social media sites and apps your child is using. Familiarize yourself with how each app is used, and what to look for with each one.
• Know your child’s social media usernames and follow/friend them.
• Review your child’s phone location and privacy settings.
• Stay up-to-date on the latest apps, social media platforms, and digital slang. We recommend https://www.commonsensemedia.org/.

There are important signs of cyberbullying. Take notice if your child has changes in device use, atypical emotional reactions, or hides screens when other people are near. Is your child avoiding talking about what they are doing when they are online? Are they creating and deleting social media accounts, avoiding social situations, becoming withdrawn or depressed, or losing interest in other activities?

Now that you know the signs, if you notice your child is having a hard time, you can take action. Ask them questions to learn what is happening, how it started, and who is involved. Remember to listen, and refrain from judgement. Take screen shots! This is your record of what is happening, when it’s happening, and who is involved. Most social media platforms have clear policies and reporting processes that can assist in removing the content. If a classmate is involved, report it to the school.

Active bystanders are important to support those targeted by cyberbullying and prevent continued incidents. Teach your children the tools to be active bystanders and stand up to cyberbullying:

• Lead by example. Model the type of behavior you want your children to exhibit. Your kids are watching—they know what you post on social media and how you respond to adults “trolling”. *
• Do not participate. Encourage children not to “like,” share, or comment on negative posts about another person.
• Do not retaliate or respond negatively. If your child feels that they must respond, encourage a calm, clear, and constructive response that makes it clear that they do not support hurtful or unacceptable content.
• Respond privately. If they feel safe doing so, your child should follow up with the person who created or shared the hurtful content privately. They should connect via private online message, phone call, or in person.
• Follow up with the person who was bullied. By reaching out, your child can send a powerful message that they care about the person and they do not support the negative behavior.

As a parent, we want to protect our children from being bullied, but also from bullying others. Empowering our children through open dialogue, increased knowledge and awareness, and providing them with tools to intervene for themselves and others are the keys to prevent cyberbullying.

*“Trolling” is defined as making deliberately offensive or provocative online posts. It is a behavior exhibited by both adults and children.

Sources: stopbullying.org, prevnet.ca